The New Mom’s Dilemma – Stay at home or Return to Work
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If you are a new Mom and worked before your baby arrived, then you surely have faced this Dilemma – Shall I take a career break, or should I return back to work.
Well, first of all, relax! All of us mothers have been through those emotions, and you too shall sail through. For someone who is well-read, has studied hard, and worked even harder to be a “Somebody” in the corporate world, it isn’t easy to give it all up one fine day. In retrospect, you sit back and think about all those deadlines, targets, and then the joys of achievement that followed with a pat on the back by the superiors. You think about the identity you created for yourself and the sense of accomplishment that surrounds it.
And then, you turn around and see that tiny little baby is snoozing on that cot, and then your heart swells with a myriad of emotions. You fear for your baby – Will she be alright without me? Who will take care of her? Will she love me any less if I went away to work? Will people judge me? And then these very emotions cloud your mind. Before you get back to work, do read about
The world of Mothers is clearly divided into two parts – The Moms who return to work and slay it. And the moms who give it all up and stay by their baby and walk her/him from infancy to adulthood. Either way – ALL these moms are guilt-ridden for one reason or the other. So, DON’T let guilt make your decision for you. There is also a third segment of Moms fast emerging – The ones who work from home. They get the most of both worlds and yet are guilt-ridden!
Whatever decision you make, think it through and do your homework before you make a choice. Amongst other factors, do think about logistics, baby weaning, support system, financial implications, emotional support, and your physical ability to stretch between a career and a baby.
Society most often judges us on our Mothering skills stacked up against some kind of preconceived generalized standards that we must measure up to. But in reality, we actually just need to strive to be the best version of ourselves every single day. Whether as a Working Mother or as a Stay-at-Home-Mom, some days will seem like a breeze, and some days would just have you stretch in all directions struggling to juggle with a million things. All you have to do is make peace with the Rollercoaster called Motherhood, and you will be fine with your decision.
5 Things to Consider before you plan to go back to work after having a Baby
The much-awaited and thoroughly loved rule of 26 Weeks of Maternity leaves definitely came as a blessing to those mothers who wanted to get back to work after having a baby. A longer leave definitely gives young mothers a larger cushion of time to care for their baby as well as recuperate emotionally and physically themselves. Going back to work is never an easy decision, and a LOT goes into executing a career come-back. Some have the blessing of having their parents or In-laws stay with them, and yet many banks on Day Cares and Nannies. Either way, if you are thinking about returning to work, do consider the following factors to make your Career come-back most sustainable.
- Own your Decision -Sit your other half down and TALK. Most often, there is a huge gap between what the mother wants to do and what is assumed she would want to do. Are you emotionally and physically ready to get back to a job, or a longer break would ease off the pressure a little more? Are you expected to stay by the baby, but your heart lies in pursuing your career while caring for the baby? It is important for you to have clarity in your head whether you want to get back to the fast-paced life of a working woman or if you want to take a break and spend time with the baby. Either way, the decision MUST be yours.
- Finance and Money Matters – Talk to your husband about your financial situation. Would you guys be alright without that extra income? Or if you do get back to work – will the daycare, maid, and transport bills ultimately offset what you may earn? Make an informed decision and get down to some calculations in case financial stability is one of the key reasons for your comeback.
- Baby Care – Who will care for your baby in your absence? Do you have parental support at home to oversee the maid look after the baby while you work? Or would you be hiring a house help to look after the baby? If yes, don’t forget to install a CCTV camera. Are there good Daycares in the vicinity or at your workplace? A strong support system makes ALL the difference and would help keep your mind at ease when at work.
- Plan B on Sick Days – In case the baby falls sick – Which they frequently do over the first couple of years- who would care for the baby? Would you or your husband be able to work from home on those days? The terms for these situations must be clear with your immediate boss before you return back to work.
- Take it Easy, if you can – Is there a lot at stake in terms of career growth if you did not return to work immediately? Is taking a short sabbatical an option? Could you look at a short-term assignment with flexible hours and a work-from-home option when required? This would help you and the baby ease into a routine and gradually give you the confidence to put in more hours at work each day.
Think about the above factors, take your time, and make your decisions. In the end, your happiness and your sanity are of supreme importance. Make that decision with confidence, and own it with a crown. More power to your choice!
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